Monday, September 1, 2008

A Real Education

In honor of labor day, I thought I'd take a little walk down memory lane to look at some of my old jobs and what they've taught me. And here they are.

  • Clothing store cashier - Getting a discount at the place you work is really dangerous
  • Psychiatrist's receptionist - Being conscientious is a really good plan, especially when you have no skills.
  • Chain restaurant server - Politeness is a virtue. Separately, and shockingly, men really will grab the ass of a waitress.
  • Personal assistant - Organizing an unorganized person's life/work is a job for people with incredible patience and stamina. I am not one of those people.
  • Bagel cafe server - Who you work with makes all the difference. Also, some people think that there is butter-flavored cream cheese.
  • Chain restaurant server, again - Restaurants are like high school. Everyone is dating or has dated everyone else. And by dated, I mean slept with. And they look on the random summer folks with suspicion.
  • Horse feeder - Hay is prickly and hurts your hands. Horses don't like it when you oversleep and don't go to the barn to feed them.
  • Dog walker - I cry when a dog bites me.
  • Organic pet food store cashier - I really enjoy organizing chew toys into aesthetically-pleasing displays.
  • Gym front desk attendant - Smiling at people when you're tired and cranky at 5:00 in the morning actually DOES make you feel better. In addition, there are people who are waiting outside of gyms before 5:00 am because they care that much about working out. I'm not passing judgment - just putting it out there.
  • Teaching assistant - Acting like a loon in front of college freshman is incredibly fun.
  • Art class model - Being still and holding a pose for hours (even 1 hour) is really, really challenging and can seem meditative or torturous - sometimes in the span of 5 minutes.
  • Telemarketer - Sometimes the best thing you can do for a job is to quit. Immediately.
  • Outdoor gear store attendant - Sales are not my thing, but I am really good at making sure that all of the hangers on a rack are exactly one inch away from each other. Quality skill.
  • Chain restaurant server, for the last time - Some people will just never be good at waiting tables. It's good to accept your weaknesses.
  • Personal fitness trainer - Working in a gym makes people think that they can say whatever they want about your body (i.e. "Have you lost weight? About 5 more pounds, and you'll look good."). Most of the time people just want to work with someone they like.
  • Personal assistant to a restauranteur - Sometimes work autonomy is a bad thing. In addition, see telemarketing. (Personal record - quit after 7 days)
  • Gym administrator - The person on the other end of the line when someone calls to complain about a bill usually has no idea what happened and has no control over it. Also, what seems like how a billing system would work is almost always not how it works. See telemarketing.
  • Legal assistant - You never know when or how really important people will come into your life, and good work friends are invaluable, especially when they're your boss.
  • Pottery painting store attendant - Children with shoes that turn into roller skates should not be allowed into stores with lots of ceramics - even if it's a store for children. Also, 3 years old is really too young to enjoy a pottery painting birthday party.
  • Standardized test teacher - Teaching someone else's curriculum is boring and kind of annoying, but it's near impossible to worry about anything else in your life while you're standing in front of a classroom.

That's a lot of jobs. I forgot about some of those - maybe on purpose. And I've had two internships since I started law school. I hope all that learning does me some good!

Happy Labor Day!


Anonymous said...

What a fun read!!! Your vitae must be pages and pages :)


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