Turn Turn Turn

To everything there is a season, and a time for every purpose under heaven.

The babe and I have a recurring conversation about death - or life - depending on how you look at it.  The babe wants to die in her 80s, and I would like someone to come interview me when I'm 110 because I'm the oldest person around.  The babe's reasons make sense - she doesn't want to live long enough to see all of her loved ones die, and she doesn't want to be alive when she can't really live anymore.

It's not that I want those things to happen - it's just that I need the time.  I cling to stories of people who are bopping around, mowing the lawn and gardening when they're in their 90s. There are so many things that I want to do, and I need all those years if I'm going to get to them all.

There are days when I feel just desperate about the fact that I don't have a garden, not even some herb pots by the window.  I wonder how I can dream of having land and a vegetable garden, how I can delightedly buy myself a copy of The Backyard Homestead when I didn't even make it a priority to rent an apartment with a south-facing window.

I'm daily traumatized by the fact that I don't write regularly, that I haven't acted in years, that I'm not in a choir, that  I haven't started my own baking/crafting business spent more time crafting, that I'm not a mom yet, that I've never learned to speak Spanish.

But then I try to calm myself by remembering back to this post I read a couple of years ago.  I don't have to do everything right now - in fact, I can't.  Asking myself to start a backyard homestead while starting a job at a large law firm would be like asking the universe to make it snow while it's 95 degrees outside.  We can't ask for all four seasons at the same time, but just because it's spring now doesn't mean it will be spring forever.

This is my legal season and realizing that it will not go on forever will allow me to really appreciate it for what it is.  Believing that there will be many, many years and many seasons in the future for me to do all of those things that pull on my heart strings helps me in those moments where I feel panicked about the things I'm not doing.

So I'm holding on to all of my dreams and desires and counting on the fact that I'll be around here long enough for their seasons to come.

Fiduciary duty from beyond the grave

I just came across this sentence in the corporations outline that I'm using to create mine:

"The burden is on the corporation to prove the decision was made in good faith by disinterred people."

And here I thought they just had to be disinterested.
Corporations just got way more exciting.

I believe children are the future

Do you remember the episode of Who's the Boss where Tony sang that song in the classroom where he was taking night classes? It was one of the later episodes after most everyone stopped watching because Sam was all grown up, and Tony and Angela were together, so it wasn't fun to wonder whether they were going to get together. The show had jumped the shark. But then last year when I didn't have television, I found old episodes on you tube and watched them incessantly. I don't know. I have a thing for bad 80s/90s television. Anyway, that's not the point.

Here's a little pick me up for your day!

Who doesn't love a lacy rabbi?

A friend came across this and felt that the babe MUST have it.

Oh, the racy nights...

Snow: Not all fun and games

I just panicked that I had missed my friend's birthday.

There's a pretty good chance that I did, although I can't really remember.

Because it's in November.

And it's February now.

But for a moment, I couldn't remember what month it was.

Like I had to stop what I was doing and think about it.

A snow week can really fuck with your mind.

Eavesdropping

Overheard between a mom and her little boy:

Little Boy: In my world, turtles would be blue and they would fly....And dinosaurs would be plaid....And I would have a dinosaur, and it would listen to everything I did...And it wouldn't eat me.

Mom: So do you want yogurt or a cupcake?

Little Boy: Yogurt.

Mom: Okay.

Dirty is as Dirty does

It's funny the things you hang onto from childhood.

It's been coming up a lot in the kitchen with my Do NOT Dirty Another Dish fanaticism.

This morning I grimaced as I was stirring the tea in my travel mug because I had inappropriately chosen a small tea spoon that was causing me to burn the tips of my fingers. The babe gave me an inquisitive look. The spoon's too short, I replied. She suggested that I use another spoon. Before I even responded, I could tell by the look on her face that she had recognized the look on my face and knew what I was going to say. But I already dirtied this one.

I think it was the last straw.

She grabbed a bigger spoon out of the drawer and shoved it into the travel mug. It's a spoon! It's not that hard to clean!

And of course, the babe is right. It seems silly to burn your fingers for the sake of one clean spoon, but it is so hard to let go of those lessons ingrained in us from childhood. I go through all sorts of machinations to keep from dirtying one more dish, particularly when I'm baking. I just loath those recipes that use the words and now, in a separate bowl....

I'm not even sure what the original purpose was - to be more water efficient? energy efficient? labor efficient? a really tenuous argument against consumerism?

Who knows? But I feel sad for my unborn children.

Short

So it's short now - the hair, I mean.

The babe loves it, and there's been no complaining. In fact, it's been mostly talk of what an amazing neck I have.

Smart girl - using flattery to make sure I never grow it long again.

FemLaw

Last semester of law school.

I've got 5 professors, and only one of them is a man.

And I wasn't even trying.

Hair: The Crazy-Maker

Watching an actress on television today, I decided that I was ready to cut my hair. I started to dial the number for the hair salon.

the babe: what are you doing?

me: i'm calling the hair salon.

the babe: really?! you're going to cut your hair?! now?! (these are not happy exclamations)

Some back story:

About 8 months ago, my hair was chin length. I decided that I wanted to grow it out. The babe expressed her disapproval of this idea (she likes me with short hair), but I really wanted to try out growing it long. I imagined it long and luscious.

It hasn't really turned out that way. Most days I wear it in a ponytail, and I don't like it that much unless I spend like an hour blow drying and straightening or curling it. Which I don't really do. So I've been toying with the idea of cutting it. So this actress put me over the edge.

The conversation continues after I make the appointment:

the babe: cancel the appointment. just wait another month. don't do it now. just wait a month.

me: but i don't like it. i don't want to wait a month.

the babe: but let it grow out. live with it for a month so that you really hate it. so the hatred is seared into your brain.

me: you want it short, though. why don't you want me to cut it? you want me to get this whole hair growing thing out of my system, don't you?

the babe: if you don't, then you're going to want to grow it out again.

me: (leaning over to the babe) i have a secret for you. i'm going to want to do it again. no matter what.

the babe: (putting her hands on my shoulders and turning me to face her) listen to me. listen. it's like you bought a house. and you're in the middle of renovations. and if you sell it now, you'll only make $400,000. and you won't really make a return on your investment. BUT... BUT if you just let the renovations finish, you'll make $500,000! A whole $100,000 more!!! JUST FINISH THE RENOVATIONS!!!

me: why do you care about this so much? has it been so tortured for you to look at me for the last 8 months while my hair has been growing out?

the babe: LONG HAIR HAS BEEN EVERYWHERE! IN THE SHEETS! IN THE BATHROOM!!! EVERYWHERE!!! (labored breathing) i'm thinking long-term. i just don't want it to happen again.

The truth comes out.

Gay boys

Overheard in the lobby of my apartment building:

Guy 1: So did you make it to the race last night?

Guy 2: What race?

Guy 1: The high heel race in Dupont.

Guy 2: (Laughs) No, that's not really my thing. You?

Guy 1: Yeah. I mean, to watch. I didn't participate.

Guy 2: Anything exciting? Did anybody fall?

Guy 1: No. And I even got a spot next to the crosswalk where the paint makes it slippery when it rains. Nothing.

Missing the babe

The babe is away for a funeral.


This morning I got up and ate breakfast, did some schoolwork, got dressed and put on makeup, got my books and lunch together, and headed out to school.


I was at the elevator before I realized I was still wearing my slippers.

Inquiring Minds

The big question of the day.



You're at someone else's house. You're peeing. In their toilet.



You notice that the toilet paper has not been put on the holder. It's just resting on top.



Do you pull some off and go about your business?



Or do you put it on the holder?

Hot Mess

Evacuation of the DC court house at 9:45 this morning.

I never saw anyone in custody. I sure as hell hope they don't just leave them in there.

Brilliant

Go to this link. Enjoy.* You can thank me later.

If you've already seen it, watch it again.

*Peeing in your pants is a possibility, so be warned.

Ooooommmmmmmmmmmlalalala

It is almost over.

We are so close, and I think that I should be able to say to myself - Focus. You're almost there. Hang in for just these last few days.

But the end is beaming so brightly at me that all I can think about are the books I'm going to read, the projects I'm going to do, the projects I'm going to start and not finish, the late mornings in bed, the brunches, the cooking, the laughing, the all the other things that aren't right here right now.

My inner buddhist is screaming in agony.

Small things

Today as I was packing up from my new study spot (the glorious outdoor terrace in our apartment building), I noticed that there was something on the power cord for my computer. I bent down and saw... a slug.

He was just hanging out there on the cord, but as I gently moved it, he shrank up a bit as slugs do. And then he made his way onto the patio. And I wrapped up the cord and put it into my bag and headed back upstairs. And left the slug to do his sluggish things.

I'm not sure why, but it made my day a little bit.

Are you dead Sanka?

I'm officially a coffee addict.

I discovered this today as I was drinking cold coffee. Not iced coffee. Hot coffee that has gotten cold.

I'm pretty sure only coffee addicts do this. People who aren't coffee addicts stop drinking their coffee when it gets cold because it's not as good anymore.

But I can't bring myself to give up a drop.

And I was planning to quit after finals.

This could be a problem.

Inquiring minds

Scene: 5:00 pm walking down the side walk on a city street. There are about 10 people within 10 feet of you. You're heading home, walking at a nice clip - nothing extraordinary but not a stroll. You see a woman walking towards you; she's alone. She's about 3 feet away when you notice that her fly is unzipped. Within 15 seconds she's going to have passed you. What do you do?

Does it change if it's a man?

Makes you want to take a dip

From the section on the Clean Water Act in my environmental law book:

"Water quality standards describe tolerable limits for particular uses (e.g., water suitable for swimming may be limited to no more than 200 fecal coliform bacteria per 100 milliliters)."

Yum.