Sunday, December 28, 2008

Infomercials are stupid unless they're for something I want

I've been watching tv lately - since I got home.
This infomercial keeps coming on for the Bender Ball - it's an ab exercise thing.
It's not really a new concept in the fitness world, but I'm sooooo irrationally annoyed by this one girl on the infomercial.
She says, "I love my abdominals. Yes, I love my belly. I love my abdominals."
Who says that?
I love my abdominals?
Shut up.
Love your belly, your stomach, even your abs - but not your abdominals.

Thursday, December 25, 2008

Joyeux Noel

In honor of spending Christmas in Paris with my little sister (who is living here this year), my mom, and the babe, I bring you a second rendition of English-French-English blogging.

It's afternoon here on Christmas. Breakfast has been eaten. Gifts have been given. Pictures have been taken (including many cheesy smiles with scarves and shirts and necklaces). Inappropriate sex jokes have been made. The babe has experienced her first Christmas morning with the gentiles. It's been good times.

We ran ourselves ragged in gorgeous Prague for three days beforehand, but we had a delightful time. We went to the Jewish quarter, saw the Prague castle, went into (somewhere close to one million) tourist shops, and listened to a magnificent concert by the Czech Philharmonic Orchestra.

Highlights from the trip have included my sister surprising us at the airport and scaring the crap out of me, all of us making fun of my mom for her corny sense of humor, me having to run back to the hotel without everyone else so that I didn't have an accident in my pants, mom getting yelled at by a scary slavic woman, all of us being shameful Americans and delighting in the presence of Starbucks (both for the beverages and the bathrooms), a ridiculously fast and terrifying escalator in the Prague metro (which the babe described as getting sucked into a vortex), and the babe and I sharing a tissue while we watched It's a Wonderful Life.

For those of you who read French:

C'est l'après-midi ici Noël. Le petit déjeuner a été mangé. Les cadeaux ont été donnés. Les images ont été prises (y compris beaucoup de sourires de fromage avec les écharpes et les chemises et les colliers). Les plaisanteries inopportunes de sexe ont été faites. Le bébé l'a éprouvée premièrement Noël matin avec les gentils. Cet a été de bons temps.

Nous nous sommes courus déchiqueté dans Prague magnifique pendant trois jours d'avance, mais nous avons eu un temps charmant. Nous sommes allés au quart juif, a vu le château de Prague, est entré dans (quelque part proche à un million) les magasins de touriste, et a écouté un concert magnifique par l'Orchestre Philharmonique tchèque.

Les essentiels du voyage ont inclus ma soeur nous étonnant à l'aéroport et à effrayer la foutaise de moi, nous tous nous moquant de ma maman pour son sens à la guimauve d'humour, me dois la course de retour à l'hôtel sans tous les autres pour que je n'ai pas eu un accident dans mes pantalon, maman obtenant hurlé à par une femme slave effrayante, nous tous sommes Américains honteux et Enchanter dans la présence de Starbucks (pour les boissons et les salles de bains), un ridiculement rapidement et terrifier l'escalator dans le métro de Prague (que le bébé a décrit comme obtenant sucé dans un tourbillon), et le bébé et je partageant un tissu pendant que nous avons regardé c'Est une Vie Merveilleuse.

And for those of you who have a sense of humor (back to English):

This is the afternoon here Christmas. The breakfast was eaten. The gifts were given. The pictures were taken (including a lot of mice of cheese with the scarves and the shirts and the necklaces). The inopportune jokes of sex were done. The baby tested it first Christmas morning with the kind ones. This was good times.

We ran ourselves torn in magnificent Prague for three days in advance, but we had a charming time. We went to the Jewish quarter, saw the castle of Prague, entered into (somewhere close to a million) the stores of tourist, and listened a concert magnificent by the Czech Philharmonic Orchestra.

The essential ones of the trip included my sister astonishing us to the airport and to frighten the bullshit of me, we all making fun of of my mom for his direction to the humor guimauve, has me the return race to the hotel without all the others for that I had not an accident in my pants, mom obtaining yelled to by a woman Slav frightful, we all Delight in the presence of Starbucks (for the drinks and the bathrooms), a ridiculously quickly and terrify the escalator in the subway of Prague (that the baby described as obtaining sucked in a whirlwind), and the baby and I dividing a fabric while we looked at this is a Wonderful Life.

Monday, December 15, 2008

From the sad halls of law...

I'm writing this post from school. That's not a big deal for those of you who are still taking finals (gooooooo you guys!), but I'm finished with finals. And yet, here I am. Printing out articles to read while I'm on vacation. The glory of having to write a note. Who signed up for this? Oh right. It was me. Hey, 1Ls out there, remember that you don't HAVE to do a journal. Make sure you really want to first. I'm sure when I finish this note and (hopefully) get it published, I'll be glad that I did it. But right now it's annoying.

Sunday, December 14, 2008


I've found out about a solution to the whole our planet is being wrecked by pollution problem, but it's not getting the air time that it deserves. So I'm spreading it through my blog. Twelve people CAN make a difference! Tell your friends...



I figure if a few people spread this along, by the end of the week the pollution problem will be solved.

Sunday, December 7, 2008

Finalz Overload? We Haz It

Scene: On the phone outside the library.

me: Okay, well I just wanted to call and tell you that I love you.

the babe: Wait. I wanted to tell you about this realization that i had.

me: ok

the babe: It's not just that kittens are cuter than puppies. The cat people are just funnier than the dog people. I mean, the funniest dog ones are the ones that have cats in them.

me: I know! That's what I've been saying all along. They're just funnier.

the babe. I know. You were right.

me: How does that make you feel?

the babe: It makes me want a cat.

Friday, December 5, 2008

You know it's good...

when your notes look like this:


Mock debriefing.
Holy lord - what the hell is going on???

Gotta love government contracts.

For all you bloggers out there.

"Words, of all sorts, have never seemed so now."

Andrew Sullivan's take on the blogging world is definitely worth a read.

I don't pretend to be anywhere close to the realm of Andrew Sullivan, but I do claim a connection just by virtue of my being a blogger. And I guess that's one of the nice things about blogging.

Thursday, December 4, 2008

I can't quit you

Not that I wanted to or anything. It was really more NaBloPoMo than you. Blasted NaBloPoMo....

Anyway, I'm back.

HI! (You can't see me, but I'm waving.)

It looks like this.

Okay, we can talk later about the horrible accident that mangled my hand and left me without a nose and with one eye larger than the other. I'm not really ready to talk about the loss of the rest of my body. Anyway, don't you know it's rude to bring that kind of stuff up? You're supposed to wait until the other person does.
Seriously. Geez.

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