This post, like law school, is stupid

Things I would really like to be doing right now instead of outlining criminal procedure:

In no particular order.

1. Eating a cheeseburger.
2. Sleeping.
3. Having sex.
4. Watching really bad television.


In less than two weeks I'm going to slather myself with beef and cheese (and maybe mustard) and lay on the couch and try to seduce the babe (which will be difficult since she's lactose intolerant and, even if she weren't, doesn't combine meat and dairy, and also, probably won't be attracted to me while I'm covered in meat because she'll be focused on the fact that I am dripping grease all over the carpet and the couch) while an episode of Pimp my Ride plays in the background (because why be judicious with your tv watching when you have enough time to watch whatever the hell happens to be on). And then sleep.

I promise that I haven't completely lost my mind.

Or, in the alternative, I have.